Have you ever been the key creator behind the most viral piece of media EVER? Can you wrap your head around what it might be like?

Hmm, me neither.

I bet that if something like this happened to you, that it’s completely possible you would get so freaked out by the sheer phenomena of being that successful that fast that you might just go completely and totally nuts.

Yes. “Totally nuts.” “Balls out.” “Balls to the wall.” Why do you think these testicular terms are all synonyms for crazy? Because KONY 2012 creator Jason Russell baring it all isn’t the first time someone experiencing emotional extremes has gotten naked in public. Naked happens, People. Move along.

I admit, I am no saint hovering above “silly” human gossip. I clicked instantly on the link to the TMZ video of Jason going “nuts” on the streets of San Diego. And I was entertained.  And I totally IM’d my geek friends asap so we could analyze every dramatic detail of the latest Internet sensation since KONY 2012…KONY 2012’s creator Jason Russell in his birthday suit letting off 80 million hits worth of steam.

I decided to reign in all my G chat gossip today to ask the following: have you ever gotten so worked up that you just had to take all your clothes off in front of people? We all (meaning everyone reading this past the age of puberty) have. It’s a beautiful thing. So what’s the big deal?

Jason Russell took his overstimulated self out into the streets of San Diego. If his little meltdown had happened at say, Burning Man, no one would have noticed Jason buck naked pounding the ground with his fists…or he might even have sparked a group dance akin to the African Anteater Ritual in the Patrick Dempsey 1987 classic Can’t Buy Me Love, where everyone just joins in because it looks like a good time.

Much like Patrick Dempsey’s character Ronald Miller, KONY’s creator is a nerdy guy who figures out how to get really popular really fast. Maybe even too fast. Ronald humiliates himself so thoroughly that his chances of being the most popular guy at school are ruined. He then explains his existential dilemma to the object of his affections, Cindy Mancini, who he’s been chasing through the film. “All I ever wanted to do was get close to you. And then when I finally got there, it wasn’t me anymore.”

Jason got close to us. Despite flaws with some of KONY 2012’s content or the controversy over his organization’s balance sheets, Jason Russell touched millions of us with his film…And then, he just wasn’t himself anymore. Actually he was exactly himself. Jason Russell. Unedited. Unfettered. Unclothed. He went crazy for a minute there. Not a huge surprise considering the uncharted territory he’d marched into.

In Jason’s own words, “Humanity’s greatest desire is to belong and connect. And now we see each other.” From his documentary to his well-documented breakdown, Jason Russell put himself out there in a way few people ever will in their entire lives. We see him…a lot more than he originally bargained for. Now what does he get for it? Hellfire and brimstone or compassion and tolerance? Does he get to “belong” now that he’s bared it all? You decide where you stand on an Internet pioneer’s momentary meltdown. Personally, I’m going for the Golden Rule.

*As of the writing of this, Invisible Children’s KONY 2012 has 83,423,510 hits on YouTube. Oops, make that 84,049,094. The video gained almost a million hits during the editing of this post.

Special Note to Jason Russell

You now have our FULL attention. Don’t hide now. Use it. Say what needs to be said. Live out louder. Use your current celebrity to make the biggest and best changes possible.

The rest of your life is an experiment, but in order for it to work you have to make up the rules as you go along because NO ONE IN THE HISTORY OF HUMANITY HAS EVER PLAYED THIS PARTICULAR GAME BEFORE. You’re the first.

Now show us what you really got. Do some ninja shit, you Internet genius you.

P.S. One piece of advice though—no more U.S. military solutions in your vids, kay? You’ve got a lot of power in that editing booth. Be careful. Thanks.

Anonymous. They do not forgive. They do not forget. Visa. Mastercard. PayPal. Amazon.com. Godhatesfags.com. Department of Justice. CBS. Motion Picture Association of America. Recording Industry Association of America. And on and on anon.

Watch out evil muthas. Geeks gonna flex.

But now here we are—WIRED.

When I started reading that magazine, no one would have called me a “geek.” Sure, I worked for a start-up, but it was more because of my character than one iota of technical skill. I didn’t get the phrase WIRED on a visceral level. I was still so innocent.

Now I suck up the electrical field of my laptop and smartphone till my frontal lobe hurts, my eyes practically pop out of my skull and my hands feel like they’re actually coursing with electricity themselves. And then I press repeat. I’m gonna kick tomorrow, I swear.

What happened?

Fucking Facebook happened. It was all fun and games till then, wunnit? Remember MySpace? Music, comments, a little NSA hook-up, perhaps? And then you logged off…maybe didn’t even open up MySpace for another week, maybe two.

Those days are over. I don’t have to tell you, you’re probably signed in to Facebot right now. And if you’re not, reading this is making you wonder if you should be.

And then, that gyaddam iPhone. Look at me, I’m capitalizing their P. I wouldn’t dream about not capitalizing their stupid P. I’d lose my internet license. Iphone. Just look at it. Ugh, so banal…but iDigress. Ha. iPhone. iPod. iPad. For those who have all three, we’ll refer to you from here on out as iPeople. iPeeps for the homies, you know who you are. And the apps?

What’s the weather? Who needs a window? I got an app for that. Newspaper? Nah, I got BBC, HuffPo and Democracy Now with built-in share functions on dial. When was my last period anyway? A calendar? Don’t be ridiculous! PeriodTracker app. (Ladies—go for the paid version on this one—it’s totally worth it.) Camera, jukebox, rolodex, TV. Jesus! I know, there’s an app for that. I think there’s a phone in there somewhere too…but who needs that when you have the Skype app?

So I was on a date tonight. Where did I meet him? You guessed it. So he’s this really nice developer guy. Smart. (Duh.) We were going to meet for dinner without ever seeing each other or talking on the phone. I messaged him to see if we could talk on the phone for a few minutes before meeting. He said he thought talking on the phone would be awkward. OK, am I stupid? Emails are the new woo?

So anyway, I go and we talk about work for a bit and at one point I hear myself saying the words, “I feel like a slave to the machines.” He nods in agreement and starts talking about his RSI (Repetitive Strain Injury) and I tell him about my friend who’s going on full disability for RSI. Full disability—FOR TYPING TOO MUCH.

WTF, iPeeps? What is this world coming to? What is my life coming to?

Convenience. Right? Typewriters sound like were they a huge hassle, don’t they? Expensive, messy ink, keys jamming up, all that wasted paper. Thank gawd we don’t have to deal with any crap like that for our computers.

Convenience. Right.

That’s bullshit. Let’s face it. We’ve got a problem. I’ve got a problem. iProblem! I’m totally WIRED. Agh!

So what now? How to move on to the next chapter of my life, away from the internet? Away from all these little machines? How on Earth do I unplug?

I could become a gardener. Though probably not a lot of growth in that field. No restaurants either…how would I feed myself?

Perhaps I could do what I’m doing right this very moment. You know, writing. I could do that without a computer. I met an incredible man in Camden Town once who’d written more than 20 books, 12 plays and tons of film and TV scripts—all on a typewriter. He typed all of them using the hunt and peck method.

I’m not a great typist, but if Allen Bennett can hunt and peck his way through a prolific career, I can certainly give the typewriter a shot. It’s retro. It’s hipster magic…and hipster is the new off-black. I’m doing it. I’m unplugging from this machine right now and I’m buying a typewriter as soon as (thrift) stores open tomorrow.

Jk. What was I thinking? Just like any junkie, I love my tainted and tawdry habit. I’m in love with it. I’m WIRED. Feels good to be bad.

Now it’s your turn. What are you thinking about your own relationship to machines, email, social networks? Share in the comments section below and don’t be shy. It’s just us.

5 Starflocking Superbloggers

Netroots ain’t Sundance, so you’re not gonna see or participate in straight star[beeeep]ing, but you might have a few drinks with the superstar blogger of your dreams. I can’t name names due to personal privacy, but I did converse with my journalist equivalent of Johnny Depp. No, make that my Gael Garcia Bernal. And it was good. Real good.

What I really mean is, your ultimate connections in progressive politics, media and tech are fairly accessible.

starflock /stärfläk/ v. to congregate or mass in a large group around a celestial entity

4 Responsibullish Drinking

Say NO to eating cute little peeglets...but say YES to bourbon!

If you’re on the wagon and in danger of falling off, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT go to Netroots Nation 2012. You will be faced with in-house happy hour events to tempt/enable/indulge. Knob Creek to go with your bacon-topped chocolate cupcake, madam? Yes, that really happened. That said, if you do wanna knock a few back at beer o’clock, NN12 has got you covered.

3 Discovering New Tools

No, not douchey people that think they know everything (though you might get a few of those). Online tools—new ones (PopVox / Tweriod / Boxcar) and best practices for the tried and true ones (Netvibes / act.ly / Prezi). Geniuses from Cheryl Contee to Deanna Zandt to Alan Rosenblatt to Beth Becker present and do Q & A’s for the likes of you and me. Gets me excited just thinking about it. (Not that way people, c’mon.)

2 Finding Your People

Halfway into Day 1, I had this permagrin going because-well, for a nonprofit Online Community Organizer like me-Netroots Nation is homebase. People are speaking my language-email conversion rates, Twitter petitions, EPA standards, race politics in America, and climate activism. Yup, Netroots is a lil’ slice o’ heaven for progressive geeks like moi and, if your eyes haven’t glazed over yet from reading this, you too. These are the people to align with when you have major shit to get done—like solving the climate crisis for instance.

1 Plugging Into the Movement

What Movement? If you asked yourself that question after reading the above header, march right up to the registration table at Netroots Nation 2012 and ask somebody (just kidding, DON’T do that.) But do keep your eyes and ears open. Your movement may just materialize right before your very eyes—political, social, environmental. Grassroots + Internet = Netroots. If you’re reading this, you’re already probably part of it or well on your way. (Or you’re one of my Internet stalkers. You know who you are.)

Now that you’ve watched that video (you’ve got to watch it)—come meet your people, pick up new tools, flock some superbloggers, plug into your movement and raise. your. glass. To Netroots!

NOTE: All posts and comments on this site are the sole opinion of the author. Shiso Social does not represent Netroots Nation in any matter whatsoever. This gushfest is brought to you by pure unadulterated enthusiasm.

“It’s been a long time, I shouldn’t have left you,

Without a strong rhyme to step to.”

—I Know You Got Soul, Eric B. & Rakim

Hello World!
It has been a long time indeed. As the one-woman show of Shiso Social for three years, I eventually began fantasizing about working with a team, doing only what I’m good at, getting a regular paycheck and maybe some medical/dental action. So I social media’d my way into one of my favorite organizations of all time, Rainforest Action Network.

After not hearing an immediate response to my resume and cover letter, I campaigned for the job by posting a video I made on iMovie to YouTube and Facebook. It was called “The Top 5 Reasons RAN Should Hire Me.” I got all my friends and family to comment on why I’d be fun to work with. It worked.

I moved up to San Francisco and am now RAN’s Online Community Organizer—handling email blasts, social media messaging & strategy, and staff training for everything from blogging to slamming corporate targets on social networks. I’ve also got the fascinating challenge of answering the social media question of the year—”So now that we’ve got em here, what are we gonna do with em?”

RAN is a good time, but I must admit—it doesn’t leave me much time or energy for working on my little web home at shisosocial.com. So, I’m back.

Yay.